Wednesday 31 July 2013

That's the power of love!!!

I got this song stuck in my head!  And I accept that! Feel like listening to it while I type this up, so I will!

Ever since I got back home from the Kyle Cease event last week in LA, I just feel so great!  I was stuck in traffic yesterday and instead of being annoyed, I chose to just accept it and focused my attention to all the beautiful greenery around me.  I never noticed just how many trees were along my route.  Instead of having a hectic drive, it was calm and joyous!

I also stopped listening to the radio when I drive.  Before I would listed to talk radio station, CJAD 800 am.  But it is constantly bad news!  Even the topics they cover for programming is NEVER something uplifting!  So now I download inspirational calls onto my phone and hit play when I drive.  I listen to the DDPYOGA podcast, Body Enlightenment calls and I just downloaded the podcast from Kyle Cease, which I have not listened to yet. 

Even the music I have on my phone I am deleting.  It is all so negative!  I choose now to only listen to more uplifting music.  Not gospel or something of that nature, but music that promotes love and joy! For example, the song from my favourite movie as a child was (you guessed it!), Huey Lewis and the News song, Power of Love, from the movie Back to the Future! 

It's ok if you laugh at that!  I do not mind.

It is what speaks to me and the kind of music I want to feel the energy from.  The negative energy from the types of music that glorify violence and promote hate are the types of music that keep me down and angry. 

I listened to too much of that stuff in the past.  Those cd's (yes, I still have cd's!) are going out of my home and car! 

I have such an amazing circle of people on Facebook as friends now.  Friends from TeamDDPyoga.com and friends from the Kyle Cease event!  I only see positive posts now on my Facebook page. 

Sunday 14 July 2013

Give me something SWEET to eat!

As you know, I am doing a raw food detox...

Friday morning however I nearly gave in to cooked foods and ate out.  After breakfast, which was a green smoothie, I got a headache.  It felt like someone gently squeezing. Like you would squeeze a cantaloupe, but this squeezing would last over an hour!  This was occurring while I was at work picking up the fresh produce from the market area.  Near the market area, there is a Lebanese place I would ALWAYS eat at! They got chicken cooked with rice and almonds, fish and veggies, paella with lots of shrimp, etc.!  It all sounds good, but it is in some serious oil! I mean, greasy!

Once I got the headache my mind/body was just craving INTENSELY something cooked! Something from that place!  I drove right to the store and sat in the car.  I downed a half a litre of water and asked myself what the hell was I about to do!  This food was what caused me to get overweight and sick in the first place!  I am on meds for hypertension, so with one of the meds, I need to urinate quite frequently after taking it in the morning.   The lil' fat evil voice in my head said, ''Well, just go in and use the washroom.'' 

To which I replied, ''Yeah right! I know what is going to happen! I'm gonna go in there and YOU will start begging me for something to eat!'' (Yes, I speak to myself when alone!) 

I closed my eyes and thought about the taste and texture of the food I would buy from there.  The warm soft chicken, surrounded by rice and tasty crunchy roasted almonds! Hmmm!

Then, I thought of how I feel after eating it.  The warm oil, coating my throat.  Even water cannot wash it down! The lack of energy I feel after eating it. It seriously makes me physically tired!  So I started up the car and drove off before my lil' fat inner demon could try to convince me again! 

That was the morning! Now for the afternoon!  Well, my lil' inner fat demon was really after me now! After lunch my body was really craving sweet!  I drove past the bakery, ice-cream shop yelling at my inner demon to stop telling me to turn in and get something!  When I went home, I was watering the garden with my daughter and she was picking raspberries.  I took one, and it was the SWEETEST thing I ate in a long time! Usually I never eat raspberries, but this one was so good! 

Now, as for what I noticed.

For the morning and the cooked food craving during the headache.  I believe that since I started the detox, that this was a symptom of the detox and the fat cells crying out for something to hold on to.  Also, my memory cells remember that whenever in pain or discomfort, I was raised with food as a remedy. 

For the afternoon and the sweet craving, maybe it was my fat cells crying out to me to compensate for 'being good' in the morning and not eating out.  But I was more surprised at how I just savoured the raspberry!  To me, it was the best raspberry ever! AND my sweet craving subdued.  It did not go away completely, but enough so that I did not have to yell at my inner demon to shut-up! 

Anyhow, my sweet craving was fulfilled on Saturday when my lovely wife make a completely raw foods style zucchini cake complete with raw icing for my birthday.  It was gluten free, dairy free, refined sugar free BUT so tasty my kids and parents loved it! 

Thanks honey!

Wednesday 10 July 2013

MY KINGDOM FOR A CHICKEN WING!!!!!

It has been a little over a week now on the raw food detox and man-o-man! I could really go for some chicken wings right about now!  As mentioned in the previous post, it is do or die for me this time around.  The raw foods detox is 8 weeks preparation and 6 weeks actual detox!  And I am on week ONE of preparation!!!!

I can daydream about it. I close my eyes and hear the Styrofoam package opening, my anticipation is at its peak. The sight of the golden brown chicken wing, so tender and plump, glistening with oil.  The intoxicating smell, so arousing! I can smell the spices!  The feel of the chicken wings, the warm oil gently burning my fingers as I hold the wing between my index finger and thumb. And finally taste! The oil running to the sides on my mouth as I bite down. The explosion of barbecue spices as it hits my tongue! The delicate meat being savored and chewed with immense pleasure!

After reading that you think someone has a food orgasm!  And there is the problem.

My whole life, has always been about food, and the wrong choices of food at that!

Yes, I can easily indulge in some chicken wings right now at this very moment, but who am I really hurting?  Eating it is only doing more harm to me.  Sabotaging my progress on this detox.
That little demon voice that says, 'A- It's only week one of the detox, it's okay.  B- Nobody else will know.  C- You are doing the workouts, you can easily burn of a couple of wings!'

A+ Well, yes it is week one and if I screw up now, I might as well not bother doing the detox. I choose to look at the detox as a challenge set before me that instead of a chore.

B+ And yes, nobody else will know, but I will.  I will not fully eat that wing with pleasure, there will be a ton of guilt associated with it.

C+ And yes, I am doing some great workouts with ddpyoga, but why burn off the deep fried chicken wings when I can burn off years of stored up fat and feel better everyday?

So I CHOOSE not to indulge in the chicken wings right now. After the detox, I will have some wings, but wings I prepare. Organic grain fed seasoned chicken wings, that are oven-baked with grilled veggies on the side. OR I CAN KILL MYSELF WITH DEEP FRIED MSG COATED CHICKEN WINGS WITH A SIDE OF FRIES!  I choose the latter of the two.

Also, if I get the right combination of spices, I can season up some veggies, it might not be the same texture of chicken, but I will be satisfied with the alternative!

Wednesday 3 July 2013

Finally Back!!

Finally back and on the journey of life once again!  Since my last video update, which I think was in February, things got worse.  My workouts were half-assed, my eating was HORRIBLE, I had NO energy and no motivation.  Luckily for me though, I hit rock-bottom and cannot go any farther down.  I am at the biggest I have ever been, 307 pounds. 307 POUNDS!!!!

What changed?  Well, let me start from the top.  I got on to a naturopath/dietitian who I had seen before and contacted again for help with getting off prescription meds.  She recommended me some supplements to take and told me to do a diet diary.  I did the first week of the diet diary and saw how bad I was eating, so I tried to do better the next week, but it was still bad.  Now here is where the explosion happened...

My wife is a health and wellness coach.  She is the polar opposite of me.  She is a beautiful healthy young woman, full of energy and life. And I am a sad, depressed, emotional eater who LIED STRAIGHT TO HER FACE for the longest while about what I eat. My eating is effecting our relationship.  I am always tired, lethargic and I blame it on the meds I take.  Well, my wife found my diet diary and she was REALLY disappointed with me.  Looking at it now, I see that she was really hurt by my actions.  I was self- sabotaging my life.  More importantly, I was lying to her.  My eating problems is the equivalent to an alcoholic.  I can't stop eating.  Well, seeing that she is truly my better half, she is helping me with my eating plan.  I am on a STRICT  raw foods detox now.  I am not doing the detox for her, I am doing it for ME! I need to OWN this and make it happen!  
Hot, ain't she!
Also Diamond Dallas Page did a live workout via online last week, and it really lit a fire under me to get back on track.  My workouts have been so much better since last Wednesday! I have been doing Diamond Cutter, modified the hell out of it!  

Here is a little vid I did today:




Here is my week 1 diet diary:

                           Thurday        Friday         Saturday         Sunday        Monday       Tuesday    Wednesday
Breakfast
10:00
12inch tuna sub
Apple juice



8:00
Green
Smoothie
10:00
12inch tuna sub
Apple juice
8:00
Green smoothie
10:00
Mashed potatoes chicken mushrooms gravy
8:00
Green smoothie
8:00
Green smoothie
10:00
12inch chicken
Sub, apple juice
8:00
2 eggs, bread, salad
10:00
Pasta and
Tomato sauce, coconut muffin
10:00
2 Jamaican
Chicken patties
Lunch
12:00
Goat Roti:
Roti is like a
Large burrito
Caribbean style

1:00
Tom yum soup
With chicken
1:00
Goat roti
11:00
Half BBQ
Chicken, olive bread, hummus
12:00
Red curry chicken

11:00
Shish taouk
Fries
12:00
15 chicken
Wings
Fries
Dinner
6:00
Grilled chicken
Sandwich
Grilled veges
fries

6:00
Club sandwich
Fries
6:00
Crudités
Almond butter
10:00
Raw foods
Dessert
6:00
Crudités
Almond butter
6:00
Quinoa salad


4:00
3 burgurs
4:00
2 hot-dogs
Poutine
Coke
Snacks
No snacks






12:00 am
2 burgers
2:00pm
4 nutri-grain
Bars
1:00 pm
Salad
4:00 pm
2 burgurs


Comments





The raw foods dessert was at an event.
Snack was just emotional eating.

Really stressful day.
Another stressful day. 
Weekly Diet Diary

Here is the week 2 diet diary:



Thursday
Friday
Saturday
Sunday
Monday
Tuesday
Wednesday
Breakfast
9:00
3-egg omlette, 2 slice whole wheat bread, Mediclear with orange juice
8:30
Oatmeal porridge, Mediclear in water
9:00
Raw foods granola, grapes, mediclear in hemp milk
9:30
g/f pancake homemade, almond butter, banana, mediclear in almond milk
10:00
Coconut muffin, green smoothie, mediclear in orange juice
10:00
Chicken, veges, mediclear in orange juice
10:00
12 inch sub, mediclear in apple juice
Lunch
1:00
Tuna salad, Mediclear with orange juice



11:30
Rice, Chicken, grilled veges, mediclear in water
12:00
Raw foods pizza, mediclear in hemp milk
11:00
Quinoa salad, mediclear in almond milk
12:00
Tuna sub 12 inch, mediclear in orange juice
2:00
Mediclear in orange juice
1:30
Sardine salad, mediclear in water
Dinner
6:00
2 chicken wraps, salad





4:00
Medium coffee, 2muffins
5:00
Millet salad, raw foods pizza
6:30
Grilled veges, chicken, salad
6:00
Quinoa salad
6:30
Millet salad
4:00
Club sandwich
Snacks
No snacks




7:30
Raw foods cake

4:00
Chicken, veges
6:00pm
Green smoothie
Comments




I know the dinner was way off.  I really just went for the coffee, but when I ordered, it just happened automatically.  I did not even realize it till I had eaten the muffins what I had ate!  I never drink coffee anymore but I needed it since I was driving to Ottawa that night.


Around 2:00 felt sick.  Nauseated and sweating, had a ginger ale and felt better.